Drowzee is low key working on her LTW but isn’t in a rush or anything. Meanwhile her mother Kelsey finished hers, and with winter creeping in soon, Slowpoke’s LTW is slowly crawling to a stand still. Since we are waiting for him to finish it before moving, it has become almost unbearable. The shitty beaches were closed due to issues arising from people even getting in the water, and we are now solely dependent on the one rip tide at the town’s original beach.
Also riding on the coattails of the last post, I also noticed I described the Ditto’s lovely abode as well. I have, of course, updated it to their current living conditions.
Slowpoke: “Wow! This bathroom is so decorative and elegant! I swear, once this house is finished being constructed, it’s going to be the nicest set up this legacy has ever seen!”
Slowpoke: “Everyone! Come in here and celebrate this exuberantly decorated bathroom with me!”
Slowpoke: “Oh man. And to think. My 25th birthday is coming up soon. I can’t wait to grow old in this place.”
The rainbow suspenders over the woolen knit sweater is a special touch.
Slowpoke: “Wait, where did my totally not steroid induced muscle mass go”
Kelsey: “Haha no one in this house can control the clothes I wear for my outerwear!! EVER!”
Kelsey: “Wait, am I being punished for that now? Forced to go to the forgotten bathroom to wash dishes only to be blocked by the forgotten child and their useless toy?”
Misdreavus: “Oh Jellybean our secret is up. I have managed to hide you from the world for as long as I could. Maybe they will accept our love now that we have been exposed.”
I think Jellybean is going to love it here in the junkyard/mini library?? Don’t remember the hella large boulders situated here and I can hardly call this place a dump anymore.
Also you can tell I’ve been in this town way too long if I don’t even remember dumping off previous IFs including one from TENTACOOL’s time.
Misty III: “Finally, a new friend! Come asshole. If you want to join our gang, you must show us now skilled you are at ~*interpretive dance*~!!”
Jellybean: “Uh. Sure I guess.”
Costume party, ya. At least the fairies seem to be down with it.
Liliana: “Call me a ladybug one more time you racist dickweed and I’m taking my costume off and beating you with it.”
Patrick: “But I’ve TOLD you I’m not here for the party I’m actually here to steal their valuables while you are all distracted :(”
Misdreavus: “I actually like hanging out with my people :)”
Kelsey: “It’s also doubled as my birthday! Woot woot!!”
As I’m writing this I just now realized that both her and her husband are a mermaid and a scuba diver and that’s just so sweet and ironically cute.
Slowpoke: “Let me go get my scuba diving outfit.”
Fuecoco: “While he’s gone, I’ll settle down behind the best view in the whole house!!”
Kelsey: “Sudden discomfort!”
Kelsey: “Oooh oof ouch my back”
Fuecoco: “GAH! My peas!! Get your ass out of my peas!!”
Kelsey: “Sorry, that’s what happens when you put your tv dinner so close to my ass!!”
Sabrina: “Hm. Now that I’m thinking about it, maybe I should have checked the expiration date on this toast before sticking the green end into the toaster.”
Sabrina: “Ah well no one else is going to actually cook today anyway. Down the hatch!!”
Jigglypuff: “Sabrina I swear to Arceus if you ass blast my floor after I just made pasta I swear to Arceus”
Sabrina: “UUUUUH, I’M NOT SABRINA! I’M BELLELBA QUEEN OF MAGIC, DARKNESS, AND THAT FEELING YOU GET WHEN YOU THINK YOU leave the oven on when you go somewhere”
JIGGLYPUFF: “HELIX DAMN IT SABRINA IF YOU DON’T COME BACK UP AND CLEAN YOUR PISS UP I’M GOING TO MOP IT UP WITH YOUR FACE”
Meanwhile Butterfree is putting how much he’d do his super great niece on blast for the whole town to hear.
Butterfree: “AND JUST SO EVERYONE KNOWS I’D BEND HER OVER THAT QUIRKY LITTLE MOTORCYCLE OF HERS TOO”
Parasect: “YEAH BUDDY!! RUIN YOUR REPUTATION FOREVER!! GO FOR IT!!”
I’m just happy they made up and are hanging out with each other again ;u;
Oh now that you’re old, this is how it’s going to be?
Slowpoke: “Starting to get a bit nippy out there, better pack a sweater”
Please ignore those fuckers please I beg of you.
Slowpoke: “Hi everyone remember if you all act up and pass out in the walkway you deserve the hypothermia you’re gonna get.”
Rosalyn: “Alright little baby. Just as we practiced. Now when he comes over to give you CPR, remember to get his phone number afterwards for me, ok?”
Valerie: “Great, the line to accidentally slipping the lifeguard some tongue just got unnecessarily longer.”
No one is getting in that water, are they.
Slowpoke: “Gee, starting to get a bit flakey, but surely when I get to work I’ll have that taken care of in no time.”
Of course.
Slowpoke: “Well that was a colossal disappointment my job as a lifeguard is only sated and I feel fulfilled when everyone on my shift is safe and practices good swimming habits.”
I’m not sated.
Slowpoke: “Time to go home and cook a thanksgiving turkey!”
Slowpoke: “Wait a tic. My orange cross senses are tingling.”
Seriously.
I actually don’t remember all these old people anymore: “Sorry I’m two hours late for my afternoon drowning I got stuck in traffic!”
Slowpoke: “I can’t take you people seriously!!”
Slowpoke: “You’re lucky I really like rescuing people and plus I get big pensions for each life I save or else I would have just continued to go home!”
Lady: “That’s such a horrible thing to admit.”
Beedrill: “I’ve been working on my spells, mother! I’ve been wondering, do you think you’d be down for a friendly duel, a spar to test my worthiness?”
Kelsey: “Oh anything for you, my baby son.”
Slowpoke: “Oh damn when’s the last time I checked on the house insurance…”
Beedrill: “GAH! Mom! You zapped what few chest hairs I had!”
Jigglypuff: “If they miss and hit my jelly on toast they are going to WISH their magic could stop me”
Beedrill: “Mom, why did you have to go so hard on me?! I’m your son! You were supposed to go easy!”
Kelsey: “In this household, you go hard or you go home you little shit, hehehe”
Jigglypuff: “I actually feel bad for you, kid. You’re quite pathetic. I think that’s hilarious. Let’s go out and get you hooked up or something.”
Beedrill: “A day of just me and my aunt out on the town? Music to my ears!”
Jigglypuff: “Also what do you think about my new superstar era limo?”
Beedrill: “No leg room, it smells like a rental, and there’s no strob lights in here to make a SimTok video to.”
Jigglypuff: “Ugh. Kids these days. So ungrateful.”
There’s currently only four teenagers in the entire town that isn’t related to the Pokémon in some way, and I found one of them through Gengar’s phone book.
Chasity: “I heard the doorbell ring but when I came out here, I didn’t see anyone. Do we have a ghost infestation again?”
Jigglypuff: “Did that hoe really just walk through me to act stupid on the end of her porch?”
Chasity: “Oh Beedrill. From my biology class. I don’t believe we have actually talked outside that one ecology project we had to work on together.”
Beedrill: “You didn’t even talk to me then, Chasity, you and the other four dumped on me and I ended up doing the whole project, remember? When I made a -C on it you and Chad Drastingburgtonlinman locked me in a girl’s locker room locker over a weekend…”
Beedrill: “Oh btw my mom put a love spell on me before I left the house lol”
Chasity: “OH BEEDRILL, EVER THE ROMANTIC~”
Jerald: “WHAT IN THE TEN FUCKS IS HE DOING TO MY GRANDDAUGHTER”
Jigglypuff: “Hehe. Doggie :)”
Beedrill: “Anyway so I tried to change your clothing in CAS while we were tongueing it up, but what gives? You’re still wearing hodge podge you put on when you fell face first into that dryer this morning…”
Chasity: “Hehe yeah buddy”
Jerald: “That’s because my baby girl is ALREADY ART! And surely you know you can’t mess with what’s already perfection!!”
Anyway. WHY IS THIS AN OPTION.
Beedrill: “Chasity, the past fourteen seconds have been the most magical of my life, and it may be the life altering spell my mother cast on me but I think I want it to last the rest of my life!”
Chasity: “Oh Beedrill, I totally feel the same way~”
I DON’T HAVE THIS MOD YOU GUYS WHAT INT HE EHLL
Beedrill: “Chasity, will you bee the queen to my hive for the rest of my life?”
Chasity: “Oh Beedrill, yes! I do!!”
Chasity: “Oh Beedrill!! I can’t wait to go to school tomorrow and tell Ronald that I’ve not only broken up with him, BUT I’m also engaged to the kid that he forces to do his homework!! This is the happiest moment of my life!!”
Beedrill: “He’s going to be so pissed but I’ll take living in a locker for the rest of the school year if it means we’re together, my darling!”
Chasity: “Honestly, why stop at engagement? We might as well commit to each other right here.”
I DON’T GOT MODS YOU LITTLE SHITS
Chasity: “Love knows no age, boundaries, law, or modification code! Beedrill. Will you be my husband, for sickness and in health, to death do us part, forever and ever?”
Beedrill: “I do. Forever and ever.”
Behold. The quickest wedding I think I have ever had. They have interacted a total of three times and known each other in that three foot space on her porch. True love and romance.
Beedrill: “Ok maybe the first time didn’t count because we don’t have a witness! That’s ok. I got someone in my corner that’s willing to give me a hand with that, I just know it! Matter of fact, I’m calling her over now.”
Jigglypuff: “I was only gone 2 minutes to steal all their double A batteries what in the hell are you two up to…”
Jigglypuff: “OH REALLY WHAT IN THE HELL ARE YOU TWO UP TO”
Beedrill: “I’m going to cherish her forever, Jigglypuff, that I swear Eternally-tus for!!”
Jigglypuff: “Wh… WHAT THE HELL DID I DO???? THEY’RE THE ONES BEING INAPPROPRIATE HERE, THE FUCK“
Chasity: “Ok maybe your aunt doesn’t count as a witness because she’s a music star and doesn’t have a ministry license. My dad does though! He printed one out years ago to lead a “secret funeral” for a cousin that’s now buried under the house :)”
Jigglypuff: “Can you believe this shit dude”
Cletus: “WHAT IN THE TEN FUCKS IS THAT BOY DOING WITH MY DAUGHTER”
So the “weddings” weren’t official, and they are still just “fiancés”. But birthdays are coming up, so we’ll see. Meanwhile across town, Drowzee was going around doing classes for skills, and I thought to look at the matchmaking option while I was near the spa for gits and shiggles.
Ah yes. The two options I most verily need. One matchmaking service for me, and one for the horse back at home.
I learned matchmaking just brings up a list of people from around town that I have to chose from (unlike the fun random choices from TS2 so that’s kinda lame. I can chose my own sims if that’s the case and save my $500). Of course, the Grim Reaper was on the list, so I picked his ass.
Drowzee: “And now that I know his number… hehe. I just wait and profit.”
She doesn’t actually get his phone number. Surprised. Bye bye $500.
But we went back in to hook the horse up too, why the hell not.
And wow! All the choices, I can’t choose between Wild Horse or Wild Horse.
No one else in town even has a horse so I doubt any of the named ones are around and about in reality.
Alas. Now Drowzee “knows of” Buffy after “their owner showing interest” but I don’t even have a way to contact the horse. Thanks for stealing another $500. Demon ass matchmakers.
Beedrill: “Anyway, back to me time! I’m still back at Chasity’s house and I’m gonna grow up into the man she can be proud of!”
Beedrill: “And all in the good company of my proud and loving father-in-law.”
Cletus: “I can’t wait until you’re of age for me to ring your fucking neck”
And here’s the last of our Saffron generation. His last trait is childish, which. We know. We can tell.
Beedrill: “And now that that’s out of the way, I think it’s time for your curfew young lady.”
Chasity: “OOH. I’ll show you the way to our marital bed.”
Staci: “TOUCH MY DAUGHTER’S BED AND I’LL REND YOU APART AND FLING YOUR PIECES TO EVERY EA WORLD IN EXISTANCE”
Yeah. I’ll send Beedrill home for a few days then.
Pokemon Rainbowcy 